It's a New Day

What a difference a day makes!

It was so nice to not wake up in a bed full of cookie crumbs and full of guilt (although in all seriousness I ate the packet of cookies on the sofa so the crumbs are probably on there instead).

I was torn yesterday over whether or not to put the link to my Blog on my Facebook page and inform everyone of what I was doing. I turned to the forums at one point for advice and was met with some mixed although very helpful responses. So nice to hear that others out there were in the same dilemma as me!

On the one hand I wanted people to know so in a way I was accountable and couldn't back out - does that make sense to anyone? Also to inspire others perhaps and just be honest in a way.

But on the other hand I thought if you need to make some sort of announcement just to see this through Emma then you're clearly not that serious about it. Or what if people were negative towards me and it set me back because my emotions got in the way??

So instead of clogging up people's news feeds I decided (for now) to join the Perth Crew Nor Group and post the link on there for other 12wbt members to see. After all, we are on the same journey, all looking for that extra bit of inspiration and support so it would be rude not to. I have to admit I am still toying with the idea of posting my Blog up but I am thinking perhaps a better time would be Day 1 of Week 1 and with a status along the lines of "Let's Do This!" and then those who are curious can read and those who aren't, won't. Urrrrggghhh even the idea of it still makes me shudder though!!

I have told my nearest and dearest about what I am doing and shared the link with them for now so it's a start. Baby steps....

So how did yesterday go for me?

I completely moved on from Sunday's slip and threw myself into eating 1200 calories and a gym session with a friend. Mainly cardio last night with some ab and core work at the end:

10 mins cross trainer
10 mins running
10 mins power walking
10 mins bike
6 mins abs
2 mins plank
Stretch

Felt good to finish a day with a workout! I like to mix the times I go up so I don't get bored - anyone else do that?

1200 calories can sound so little but when you're eating the right things you can eat so much.

Again boredom is a thing for me so I am forever trying to keep it interesting, trying different flavours and new recipes. I think that's why Michelle Bridges appeals to me so much. If someone told me I could only eat chicken and broccoli for 6 days of the week I think i'd go into melt down and eat the entire cake isle at IGA. Although IGA is super expensive so I might make the drive to Coles instead...

Anyway! Hope everyone else had a positive start to the week and if not, tomorrow is a new day :)

Goal Setting

Apart from the puppy emergency and slight set back last night, my weekend was quite a succesful one in terms of blogging and eating.

I stuck to my 1200 calories (crazy cookie episode aside - if I don't talk about it, it never happened right?!?!) and completed my "Goal" setting task.

I imagine some of mine are pretty similar to others of you on the 12wbt or journeys of your own such as weight loss and increased muscle tone but there is one very important goal for me in all of this and it isn't measured by a scale or jean size...

"Get back the control and form a healthy relationship towards food."

 

I don't think anyone should conform to a certain size or shape but I do believe that if we are in control and have a healthy relationship towards food as well as exercise, the rest falls into place. Speaking from experience, a negative and unhealthy relationship towards food is one that consumes you and makes you miserable.

 

And just in case you were wondering, here are my other goals for the next 12 weeks:

 

Month 1

• Lose 4kg
• Run 5k once a week on top of daily workouts
• Lift heavier at the gym
• Have 1 treat meal without feeling guilty
• No binging
• Book into a charity run

Month 2

• Lose 7kg
• Run 5k twice a week on top of daily workouts
• Lift heavier at the gym
• Stick to the plan whilst on my holiday in Bali
• No binging
• Try a new sport

Month 3

• Lose 10kg
• Run 5k three times a week on top of daily workouts
• Lift heavier at the gym
• No binging
• Complete my 12 weeks with a bang

 

I've thrown in a few extra special goals to achieve each month that I want to add to the above just to keep it interesting:

• Do something that scares me
• Create a recipe from scratch
• Do 20 burpees everyday (vom)
• Blog daily

Phew! I think that's enough to keep me busy?! Looking forward smashing these and hearing about goals that others have made.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Commitment

Let's be honest, most of us live our lives out through one form of social media or another...I know i'm certainly guilty of it!

We live in a society where we know what our neighbour down the street had for breakfast or what our ex's new girlfriend looks like. More to the point, we log on to search for this information!

So it seems only fitting that today I post the link to my Blog on my Face Book page and shout from the rooftops about what i'm doing.

But for those of you who may ask why, I write this post today....

I am not overweight. I know this. But I do have a bad relationship towards food and I would call myself a classic binge/emotional eater. I turn to food in moments of need or when i'm feeling stressed for a quick fix and since moving to Australia, these moments have become more frequent.

Why I hear you ask? I mean you're surrounded by beaches Emma, sunshine 9 months of the year, you have an amazing job, wonderful friends, the cutest puppy. What could you possibly have to moan about?

Don't get me wrong, I hear what you're saying!! I often ask myself the same thing, over and over and over again. I often bury what i'm feeling to those around me, choosing to suck it up and put it down to feeling a bit tired or having a bad day. But not dealing with how i'm feeling and being honest about it is what leads me to have these binge moments. I let it all build up inside until it becomes too much and I can't control it instead of dealing with the problem face on.

I'm telling you all of this today because I had one of these very moments last night.

On Saturday night I had a cosy night in planned with my puppy and housemates dog. They had gone out to watch a show and as I had a 4am start the next day, I was looking forward to a movie and an early night. At about 8.30pm my puppy was stung in the face by a bee and reacted badly. She couldn't breath properly and her whole face blew up with swelling. I went into auto pilot mode and after a quick call to my boss got her to the vets ASAP.

It must have been the longest 21 minute drive EVER! Marlot was taken straight in when I arrived, the bee sting pulled out of her nose and given a large dose of antihistamine to bring down the swelling. I couldn't leave until her heart rate had gone down as the vet said small puppies can go in anaphylactic shock so we needed to stay there.

I am so thankful to say that as I write this Marlot is at home safe and recovered, most likely eating the cat. She looks completely back to normal and escaped having to be pumped full of steroids.

I went to work yesterday and the world kept on moving!

But last night when I finally sat down after a day at work, my housemates had left for dinner and I was with my thoughts, it hit me. That feeling started to creep up inside of me.

Marlot could have died.
I am a shit owner.
I couldn't ring my Mum for help.
I didn't even know how to get to the vets.
I am so isolated in this place.

I got inside my head and weighted down by all of this negative thinking. I was tired from 4 hours sleep the previous night and I saw no way out of it. So I ate 17 biscuits and a plate of wedges. Yes I can hear you laughing! My boss did the same thing and I can actually laugh about it today because it seems sooooooo silly now! But at the time I was so upset and saw no other way to cheer myself up. But I want out of this ridiculous cycle! I know i'm not a big girl but i'm not happy with what i'm doing to myself and I want the control back.

So this is me, baring it all. Admitting that although I love, love, LOVE my new life here in Australia I do get a bit sad by it all sometimes and turn to food for comfort.

I'm sad that I can't call my Mum in a time of need.
I'm sad that my Aunty is suffering with cancer and í'm not there to give her a hug.
I'm sad that there are friend's babies i've not even met yet.
I'm sad that my puppy isn't playing with our family dog.
And i'm sad that chocolate just doesn't taste the same over here!

All this being said, i'm glad that it happened. My wonderful friend woke me up with a healthy breakfast this morning, she made me a salad for lunch and she sat me down to talk things over. Something i've been trying my best to avoid because a part of me feels like i'm a failure or somehow ungrateful if I talk about missing home. Others out there are suffering on a daily basis and i'm moaning because I miss my Mum. A risk I took when I moved here.

It's made me realise that it's ok to be open and honest about things, that it is normal to miss the place I grew up in and have 25 years worth of memories. Dealing with the feeling is better than burying it with biscuits and waking up the next day wracked with guilt. Instead of pretending to myself and to others that I am happy 100% of the time, I will be honest and i'll work through it.

Yes I have the best job that has allowed me to do and see things I never could have done in England.
Yes I have the most amazing friends who feel like they have been a part of my life forever.
Yes I have a lifestyle most people dream of.

But it is ok despite all of the above to sometimes just miss riding my pony with my cousins in our flooded school because it's pissed it down with rain all month and feel a little bit lonely because of it. I'm only human.

So in light of last night's feast supreme I have come up with a plan to help me the next time a situation like this might present itself. Behold my list!

Whenever I feel like a naughty little binge i'll do these things instead, work through my list and end it with some sleep. Because let's face it, there's nothing like a new day to help you move on and put things into perspective.

The most recent task I have to complete for the Michelle Bridges 12wbt is the "Commitment'' task. So here is my commitment to myself and for all to read - I will do this for myself and I shall smash the 12 weeks! It will be hard sometimes but that's ok, i'll work through it and i'll be honest the entire journey.

Who knows, perhaps being so open about what i'm doing and why will not only help me but others out there who are in a similar situation? That would be pretty cool :)

The "Should" Word

I went to the movies last night to see Iron Man 3 (a little bit fucking awesome I might add) and I found myself in a "should" situation.

You know the one..."I'm going to the movies so I SHOULD" eat popcorn as it's the norm. A bit like its sister scenario "I'm going out with the girls so I SHOULD drink 20 cocktails."

I've created habits for myself which need to be broken and instead of taking "should" out of my vocabulary all together, I need to spin it around.

I SHOULD workout everyday. I SHOULD eat healthily everyday. I SHOULD smash this Michelle Bridges 12wbt and give myself a reason to be proud.

Oh and by the way, "should" in my dictionary actually means "will"....

Needless to say there was no popcorn in my lap last night and I woke up with a clear conscience. I SHOULD be proud of myself :)

Pre Season Period

So with 17 days till the round kicks off, I took to the Forums to ask what everyone else was doing in preparation.

It would seem most of the answers are pretty similar, sticking to 1200 calories a day and taking part in daily exercise so I have adopted the same approach.

I used MyFitness Pal to record my calorie intake for yesterday and followed a workout at the gym last night for 42 minutes. I will continue to do this up until the round starts and whilst i'm working through all of my pre season tasks.

Speaking of which, how have I not thought to make a plan before and set myself goals and targets when it comes to diet and fitness?? It seems so simple now I can't understand why or how I ever overlooked it.

I organised a charity event to raise money for Breast Cancer Care WA last week and spent weeks planning, reseaching and preparing for it. I never would have dreamed of organising such a thing without all the work put in prior. Yet for some reason I have always approached the task of losing weight and changing my lifestyle with little more than an "on the moment" decision. No wonder I am yet to be successful!

I enjoyed the EXCUSES part of pre season - I almost felt like Michelle Bridges herself was directly speaking to me when she mention the "tired" excuse! Oh how many times have I been there, convincing myself that spooning my pillow would be much more fun than 20 burpees. I've got to it admit though, i've never felt guilty after doing the burpees...the spooning on the other hand...

My puppy likes to spoon

So What Is Michelle Bridges 12wbt?

For those of you reading this blog and not joined onto Round 2 2013 of Michelle Bridges 12wbt, here is a little insight into what the programme includes:

• Pre Season tasks prior to the 12 week course starting which help to prepare you
• Weekly shopping lists and meal plans which include step by step recipes
• Work out plans
• A page to record weigh in statistics and measurements
• Opportunities to win prizes
• Forums where you can meet and talk with other members

Having found myself lost when it comes to taking care of myself, this programme couldn't be any more perfect for me! It really is fool proof and gives you detailed instructions, advice and tips and 24/7 access to all the help and information you could possibly need.

I am already finding the online support offered by other members in the forums an absolute godsend. It is so comforting yet inspiring to hear of the thousands of other people out there all embarking on the same journey I am, the one to creating our best selves!

Not only do I want this for myself but I want it for others.

The human race really can be special sometimes can't it? We truly do unite in times of need...

Do You Believe In Signs?

I often think life throws us little hurdles, not to purposely knock us down but to show us how strong we can really be. It could be something as huge as the death of a loved one or something smaller like a rude customer at work.

Today I had one of these moments...

It was something simple, a social plan I'd had made not going to plan but it was enough to make me feel disappointed and think "do I now sit in and turn to food for comfort??" "Now life hasn't gone to plan tonight do I throw in the towel and start again tomorrow?" The internal excuses began to circulate in my mind.

So what did I do about it? Well ill tell you what - I dug deep! I made my chicken salad from scratch and then I turned to my runners for a session at the gym. I proved to myself that I was strong enough to get up and go - I sucked it up!!

Mentally I now feel a little more prepared for whatever hurdle is thrown at me next because I have this little success under my belt. It's a sweet sign which has given me an insight into what I am capable of doing. And we are ALL capable of completing this journey if we believe hard enough in ourselves and overcome our hurdles.

I'd love to hear if you've already overcome a hurdle during pre season! Or if you've witnessed your own signs :)

Who Am I??

Hello and welcome to my Blog, cake0holic!

Firstly I just want to say a huge congratulations because I imagine that 99% of you reading this are doing so for inspiration or seeking support whilst on your own weight loss journey. Big pat on the back for you :)

For those of you who don't know me, I'll start at the beginning....

My name is Emma-Louise and I am originally from England, now living and working in Perth WA.

I moved here in June 2012 searching for a better quality of life and wanting to experience part of the world away from my own front door step.

I work for a charter company in Hillarys (the best one in WA I might add) and have an amazing network of family and friends worldwide.

I am also Mother to a golden Labrador called Marlot, my little love!

Like most girls out there I have never been completely happy with my weight, yo yo-ing back and fourth between various diets, starvation and binging periods. Moving away from home was quite difficult as it turns out and home sickness got the better of me, causing me to emotionally overeat and start a vicious cycle.

I have joined up to Michelle Bridges 12wbt after reading the thousands of success stories out there and researching the plan which is completely laid out for you both from an eating and exercise perspective. It also touches on the mental issues such as excuse making which stop you from reaching your goals and this is most certainly something I can relate to.

I am completely lost and want to rebuild a healthy attitude towards food and exercise - this is why I am here.

I want to be my best self today, not tomorrow or the day after that and the only person that is going to get me there is me.

I will be blogging about my 12wbt journey and hope to inspire others out there into making the change to become their very best self today too.

Let's cut out the cake together!